Mentoring > Coaching
Let us be frank–the soup du jour in recent decades in the kingdom is: Coaching.
Let us be more frank–“Coaching” is a poor man’s excuse for Mentoring, period.
We frequently hear about Executive Coaches and Life Coaches that are hired to work with pastors and parishioners alike.
Of course, kingdom mentoring is not wrong; it is mandated (see Deuteronomy 6, Ephesians 4:11, Patriarchs - Sons, Moses - Joshua, Samuel - David, Jesus - Disciples, Paul - Timothy).
Notice, however–in both the Biblical and soon to be seen Homeric pattern–that mentoring, and the passing of the baton from an older man to a younger man, or of a transfer containing wisdom and knowledge from one generation to the next, is always encapsulated in the confines of relationship.
Acolyte of history that this author is, a return to the roots of a pre-Biblical model of Mentoring is in order. Where relationship is king.
In Homer’s 9th century B.C., Ancient Greek sea-faring epic poem The Odyssey, the protagonist Odysseus leaves his island kingdom of Ithaca to fight for the Greeks in the Trojan War. In his absence, he astutely places his young son Telemachus under the care of his old trusted friend, counselor, and adviser. His name was: Mentor.
Little would Odysseus know that the duration of his journey would ultimately last 20 years.
In that span, Mentor served as a surrogate father of sorts to the child, growing teenager, then young adult Telemachus, the prince of kingdom.
Mentor’s role was there to guide, teach, and nourish the king-in-training in absence of his father.
Nowadays what a mentor is can reflect myriad notions. And often along the lines of a sadly diminished notion in Coaching.
But in its origins, a mentor runs deeper than we realize ; it involves relationship, it connotes raising . . . it conveys fathering.
If you’re not projecting a fatherly role in a younger person’s life–in other words, in a strongly relational manner akin to a father - son model–then you’re simply not mentoring. Not in the origin, and not in the primacy model of what a mentor is and does. The name is a derivative via a fictitious man, whose very name became a verb that’s held for almost three millennia: Mentor.
Let us consider:
Mentoring = Relational
Coaching = Transactional (literally financially speaking)
Mentoring mirrors discipling; coaching mandates money.
Mentoring is based on relationship; coaching is founded on recompense.
Mentoring takes time; coaching squeezes you into someone’s schedule, with a dollar sign attached.
Ponder this: Shouldn’t you be seeking out Mentors instead of Coaches?
Ponder this more: Who is mentoring you? And whom are you mentoring?
“For though you have 10,000 teachers in Christ, you don’t have many fathers. I became your father in Christ Jesus through the gospel. I urge you, then, be imitators of me.”
–Paul in 1 Corinthians 4:15-16
We need more Mentoring and less Coaching in the kingdom.
The Bible and ancient Greeks coalesce and concur.
Josh Biedel taught in public education for 10 years from middle school up through college, and served as vice principal at a classical high school. He holds four degrees, and is currently a pastor in Sacramento, California; he is also a professor at Theos Seminary, and is the Editor of Theos Resource.
